dreaming aggressively

[chickentimeschickenways]

One.

I am going to Ireland in September. I am hopeful but trying not to think about it too directly, lest the depressive thoughts get their claws in. There are things I am sure I can achieve. One: listening to music + drinking a Guinness. Two: going to a free museum and the Irish-language bookstore in Dublin. Three: bowl of soup. 

Two.

I expect to go to Wales and Yorkshire in 2020. Also possibly Shanghai, though I'm not sure how I'll swing that. (Maybe that's more of a 2021 trip.) I also need to go home to Iowa and possibly down to Dallas.

Three.

I've lost the trick of thinking optimistically, so I can only tell myself stories about other people who are not me, but who are doing things I would like to do. So: Another person who is not me finishes a fantasy quartet by the end of 2021, while also writing a lot of short stories and nonfiction essays about plants, architecture, farming, and language. This person has a small and dedicated following by then, and they also have the ability to apply for jobs based on the research skills evidenced in their writing, even if it isn't their full-time gig.

Four.

I would like to rove over the landscape continually, but with the safety of having someplace to come back to. I am not sure how best to achieve this.

Comments

[sebenikela]

i really want to go to Wales for no real reason besides IT LOOKS PRETTY and also MAGIC and WELSH GUERRILLA WARFARE IN THE 13TH CENTURY

"I would like to rove over the landscape continually, but with the safety of having someplace to come back to. I am not sure how best to achieve this."

I...yeah. I feel this.

[chickentimeschickenways]

God, I fucking love Wales. My friend has a farm with 20-25 heritage sheep, some of whom accept head skritchies, and there's nothing better than plodding up a big-ass green hill to see a vast landscape of plushy green hills unfolding before you. (Side note, The Life of Rebecca Jones by Angharad Price is very good and very Welsh -- translated from Welsh, actually -- and very short.) The first time I was there, one of the sheep rejected a newborn lamb, and my job was to sit with him in the field while he toddled about so none of the other sheep would be mean to him.

THERE ARE JUST SO MANY PLACES I WANT TO GO. I think I would be okay just hauling my stupid ass around a bicycle for six months out of the year, if we're going to be environentally friendly, or even hiking long-distance, just so long as I knew that I would come to a place where I could stop and rest for a while.